I know of your pain....

 




Illness. It can strike at any time. Everyone gets the cold, a flu bug or just has an icky day. But there are also those who have a chronic illness, such as Lupus, cancer, or any other malady that distracts them from life, from friends, from family. It is so easy to fall into the "pity poor me" trap. When I was first diagnosed with both lupus and rheuamtoid arthritis, I felt as if a ton of weight hit me, both figuratively and literally. It began as what I thought was the onset of a flu. Except that the feelings of exhaustion and joint pain did not go away. Three weeks later when I was diagnosed, I was devastated. This was in 2000. There were no remedies on the market yet such as there are now, so I was told to take acetaminophen and wait it out. Several years later, when I was at a gas station, I slid on ice and fell, landing on my back. I stared at the sky as I called for my 16 year old son to get out of the car and help me up. I knew then what a turtle on it's back felt like. I felt it too. Helpless. Embarrassed. A burden on others. It progressed to where I could barely lift a pencil, but I kept on working anyway, hoping that movement would keep me from stiffening up. I am happy to say that there are drugs on the market now that keep the stiffness at bay and I can function once more, but I will never be what I once was. I had a hard time dealing with that. Until a friend said: "at least you are still alive!"

I know of someone who has horrible back issues with pain and weakness. He also tries to do his best to raise his family of four girls with help from his wife, work on growing his organic veggies and hold down a job. He gets irritated with himself also that he can no longer do what he once used to, but keeps a sense of humor about it. Another friend of mine has a son with Duchenne's muscular dystrophy. He is in his early 20's, confined to a wheelchair and in need of round the clock nursing, yet he still takes classes to improve his mind and does very well in his work. Jerry Lewis would be so proud that he has lived this long, as just as recent as 20 years ago, most children diagnosed did not live beyond their early to mid teens. What this young man now offers to others is inspiration, in that his can-do attitude should make the rest of thankful for what we have been given- namely, the ability to come and go as we please, without being so dependent on someone else.

My point is: we all have issues. In our minds, they can be huge, insurmountable, unforgiving. I am NOT going to say to you that your Cross is any worse or better than mine! Far from it! I can look at you and say, "yeah...but...I have it so much worse!" That would not be fair. I am tough and because I have been in pain for so long, it is just a common everyday thing now. I shrug, I try to be as normal as I can. Why burden anyone with my complaints? But maybe it's harder for you and I realize this. I admit though, that there are times I mourn what I cannot do and this is OK, too, in fact, necessary. I have a wonderful husband who holds me when I need that hug and tells me it will all be ok, because he said so! I admire others who also go on, despite chronic pain, who can provide that support to each other. Even a smile works wonders on another's soul.

What I don't like is when I pull into a parking spot, put the blue handicapped tag out and then am watched by others as I slowly get out of my car. I have even had a few people take me to task, telling me that I don't LOOK handicapped, so I should be using a different spot instead. They can't see what I feel, yet they judge me anyway. No, I am not old, stooped, wrinkled, missing a leg or using a walker. However, I do have issues with walking long distances. But do they need an explanation? How is it their business?

Maybe instead of offering judgment, offer kindness instead. If you see someone struggling, just offer help. Smile, use kind words. Some days for us are better than others. How do you know if someone is having a good or bad day?
You don't.
So be kind anyway. It can make a bad day good, a good day better and the best day even better yet.
Be the example that Jesus would be proud of. Be a hero in the life of someone else... Just by being you!