on being a bully........

“No one is born hating another person because of the color of his skin, or his background, or his religion. People must learn to hate, and if they can learn to hate, they can be taught to love, for love comes more naturally to the human heart than its opposite.”~ Nelson Mandela

Bullying. I am sure that we ALL have stories to share of a time in our life when we were bullied as kids. The taunts. The threats. What did you do? How did you feel? Was it because you didn't fit in? Were you a nerd? A wallflower? A bookworm? Let's face it, kids will latch onto anything just to tease and torment another.
Fast forward to adulthood. Think you're past all of that? Maybe not.
There was a news story yesterday about homes that had political signs that were vandalized. The signs were destroyed and the homes had graffiti spray painted on them. Recently there was a rash of church vandalisms also, with hateful words spray painted, windows broken, doors smashed in.
Just because someone publicly posts a view that may be different from yours, does this give just cause to defacing property? If you have a different religious view, should you destroy another's church? Can we get along with differing opinions? Do you have an open mind to hearing what the opposing side may be?

Bullying has taken a new form. No person or place is immune to it. It can happen in the workplace, with insecure passive-aggressive co-workers plotting revenge. It can happen in families, with resentful members backstabbing you; or even in a relationship, where one fears for his or her life from another that they thought loved them. It can happen anywhere, at any time.
It used to be that the one being bullied was told to ignore it and it would stop. Or to try and make friends with the one who was bullying, in  the hope that it would cease. In the movie, "Bells of St. Mary," Sister took a young student under her wing who was being bullied by a much bigger boy. She taught the smaller one how to box. When another confrontation ensued, the smaller boy took on the larger one, winning the confrontation. The scene ended with him shaking the other's hand, telling him it was time to move forward and be done with this.
Life is not a movie and turning the other cheek doesn't work either. In fact, bullying can go so far as to take a life. I often wonder why kids think that to have power and control over another is a good thing. Where do they learn to hate? and who from? What does the bully hope to reap by being so hateful towards others?
To have peace, one must be peace-filled. It begins when a child is a baby. The child must be shown that his or her needs will be taken care of, that the world is a secure and loving place. Parents, by the words and actions they perform everyday, are the greatest examples of what love is. If a parent comments on how fat someone is out loud, the child picks up on that, thinking that "fat" is a bad thing, or to be poor is bad, or a different color, race, religion, creed. Anything is fair game. They soon learn that there is pleasure in supremacy and that a weaker person is to be abhorred. This includes families where the young child witnesses abuse from one adult to another. The child learns that anger and acting out is how a problem gets solved, that name calling and hitting until another submits is somehow justified. Or how about being in a vehicle in which the driver flips off another, or cuts someone off, or uses foul language to vent their feelings. The child is a magnet, picking up on every little nuance. Their innocent minds absorb so much. Keeping this in mind...

When does the cycle of hate end???????

Today, really begin to watch your words, your body language, who you choose to hang out with. Communicate versus destroy. Your words, how do they make others feel? Body language, how does it look to someone else? To bring about peace, it has to begin with each one of us.