does your significant other still make your heart giddy with joy?
With Valentine's Day fast approaching, I thought it would be a great time to remind all of my readers, both male and female, of the "rules" of a relationship. So often, we get so caught up in the day to day conundrum of life that we tend to take our significant other for granted. We complain, we piss and moan, we shrug off a hug or maybe we just don't talk much at all. I have mentioned in past posts about the husband and wife who argued and her last, parting words to him before he left for work was "go to hell!" as well as another statement that dropped the F bomb. He died unexpectedly that night. No kiss and make up session. Nothing for her but the memories of that morning that will stay with her forever.
Has that ever been you? Have you sent your love of your life off with angry words? Bitterness runs deep.
I saw this today and wanted to print it here as a reminder that life is short. Why do you wish to create barriers between you and the very best reason that you are married today? Go back to the days when you first got together. Remember the giddy joy that you both felt? If your relationship has taken the hit, read the following and apply it to your life. (credit goes to Sharon Jaynes, "Girlfriends in God" author)
Here's something your husband / wife wanted me to post this morning…
Words Never to Say to Your Husband or Wife:
I told you so!
You just don’t think!
It’s all your fault!
What’s wrong with you?
I can’t do anything to please you!
All you care about is yourself.
You never listen to me!
I don’t know why I put up with you!
What do you want now?
How many times do I have to tell you?
Words Your Husband/wife Longs to Hear:
I’ve been thinking about you all day!
What can I do for you today?
How can I pray for you today?
The best part of my day is when you come home.
You are one of God’s most precious gifts to me.
You are so wonderful.
You look so handsome today.
I don’t feel complete without you.
I will always love you!
I trust your decisions.
Let us never forget to say also, when we are wrong...."I'm sorry!"
The two hardest words to say in the English language are "I'm sorry!" Thanks for reminding us that they are also the most healing!
ReplyDeletewhat happens when it is one sided? I have been doing the good part with my husband and he either ignores me or just doesn't answer at all. I am miserable and don't know what else to do to get his positive attention!
ReplyDeleteSee the picture of the flower in the post? If he wanted you in his life, he'd show it. Maybe he doesn't want you in his life. Maybe you need to remind him of that!
DeleteWow! Being in a new relationship, I am still learning all of this...and I am taking notes!!! Thanks for the heads up!
ReplyDeleteInstead of using attack words, such as "you never, you always..." say instead, "I feel so hurt when this happens." or "I feel so abandoned when I am not hugged enough." The "You" words just are too pointed and allow someone to take a stand, however silly or pointless it may be. As I said, they attack another's credibility and nobody wants to be put on the spot like that. For example:
ReplyDeleteYou never hug me! You never say thank you when I make you dinner! You always leave your dirty shoes on the floor!
Instead:
I feel slighted when my dinner goes unnoticed. I am hurt when I don't hear "I love you" enough! I feel abandoned when the TV is on and I am ignored.
See? It does make a difference. and also the VOLUME of your voice matters. DO NOT YELL AT SOMEONE!!! See? Even in print, it hurts!!! Use a soft voice...talk to your SO as you would a best friend. And..aren't they your best friend? Just some stuff to think about!!