in memory of...all those who have succumbed to drug use

"Anger will eat you alive just as any other addiction will... And that is why healing does not lie in anger; it lies in empathy and love. It lies in changing your mindset, if not to one of love and forgiveness, then at least to one of love and acceptance."

 


Re: Phillip Seymour Hoffman. Hollywood actor, he performed in some amazing roles in film. He also died due to a massive heroin overdose. It was reported that he had remained sober for 23 years and then the lure of the drugs called him back.

I have written about the sadness of alcohol addiction in both "Walking in God's Shadow," as well as "There, but for the Grace of God (plus a few good friends & family) Go I," and of meth addiction in "Little Girl Lost..." and how in some people,  both drugs and alcohol can be a controlling monster. Nikki Sixx of Motley Crue also wrote a book, "The Heroin Diaries," that told of his despair in using heroin. Luckily, he has now been clean for so many years and in his book, he made a lot of the same points that I also brought up--that if you have a family...you need to realize that they need you more than drugs want to take control of you. I know of a few who used meth. Some broke free of it and have remained clean for many years...others died from its abuse. The ones who are still clean...they have reported that there are days when the call comes to them....they still crave that intense high. I cannot sit in judgment of anyone who is held in the grip of the pain of alcohol/drug abuse. How can I? I have never "been there and thank God for that! I only wish, I hope and I pray that when there are children involved....that they realize that it is the child who pays. It is ALWAYS the child who pays!

There are others, though, that hold those who do drugs in contempt. And I can see their point. It is irresponsible, especially when you have a significant other and children in the mix. I have seen kids who sit in a house with no food, doing nothing except waiting for mommy and or daddy to "wake up" so that they can eat. Except that there IS nothing to eat! Money that was meant for rent just went for a pill. Life is uncertain...no, let me rephrase that: life is hell for all concerned. Promises of "just this one, last time..." become as worthless as used toilet paper. Because an addict knows, there will always be another "last time"...and another.  Until they die.

I am going to print some comments that I have seen today here--both negative and positive. I won't point out which is which...I'll let you decide....which side of this debate are you on? Are you judgmental....are you compassionate? How can this problem of drug use/abuse be solved? What must people do to realize....all it takes is just one more hit, just one more drink until...there are none left because you have just OD'ed? What Will It Take?

"Artistic responsibility? Give me a break. He had three kids. He had only one responsibility and that was to be a father instead of a pampered junkie."

 "My mother has been clean for 13 years, and she'll be the first to tell you that sometimes, all she wants to do is go out and smoke some crack. The compulsion to use is always there."


 Heroin addiction is a brutal monster to conquer, and I don't think people realize the internal strength it takes to get over a disease like drug addiction. It took an overdose and two weeks in a coma and learning to walk/talk/breathe again to get me clean, and it was the biggest demon I've ever battled in my life. The sadness and despair an addict experiences in those dark days is the worst kind of hell you can imagine, only made worse by excruciating withdrawal when you can't get your fix.

"If you think addiction can't happen to you or someone you love, you are naive and foolish. This is a society that desperately avoids pain at all levels--physical, emotional, and spiritual. We drown out our problems in pills and chemicals...is it any wonder we lose some of our biggest and brightest to this sickness? I wish people could stop judging, get off their pedestals, and have some empathy for those who suffer among us, some of us secretly and silently. Rest in peace, Mr. Hoffman. Enjoy your journey on the other side."

 "Be angry at addiction, not the addict."

 "Yet, people do have to wonder what is it in these heads that make them choose a stupid drug over their families, their unborn children, etc."


 "I never intended to become addicted. I didn't WANT to disappoint everyone who loved me. I didn't INTEND to throw away my marriage, my life, and be a terrible parent. The knowledge of all that destruction pills and drugs cost me keeps me in check now. And it has also given me a fundamental empathy for the silent pain and struggles people go through. Everyone you meet could potentially be days away from their own ending, even you. That is why compassion is so essential to us as human beings. Because we are all someone's son or daughter, parent or friend. So be kind and be loving and realize that we are all just human and doing the best we can."




 "As a daughter of both parents with addiction of varying degrees and types, I can say that anger has colored every part of my childhood and most of my adult life. In the end, it is my responsibility to handle and deal with my grief and anger - regardless of how my parents deal/dealt with theirs. I can let it fuel my own addictions or I can allow it to slip from my life and make way for something more beautiful. Something that focuses on the love that I have held for my parents. Addiction is ugly and messy and scary. And a child dealing with a parent's addiction has a horrible burden to bear. So let's stop with hate for the addicted ones and spend our energy and love on the neglected ones. That is when healing can begin."



 "I have precious little sympathy for celebrities either. Oh you poor thing so you got paid more for one movie and six months work than most hard working people will see in a lifetime of being wage slaves. The pressures of knowing you don't actually have to work at anything but feeding your ego. Poor thing. So you are special because they televise shows of these over paid numbnuts awarding each other and patting each other on the back. Then they go to try and prove how special they are by drugs not killing them...whoops. No it's not the addiction it is that there are hundreds of depressed kids and adults that die every day and even then they rarely get a mention. This bloke could afford the best care decent rehab, you name it. He made a choice, sad but no sadder than all the other poor devils that die unheralded."



to see a list of books that I mentioned here, click on this link:   www.dianeganzer.com