how much is "enough?"

 Daily inspiration: Father's Day is now past for another year, as is Mother's Day. Although these are cute observations created by Congress and endorsed by many businesses, in which a parent is honored, God went one step further a very long time ago, declaring to Moses that parents MUST be honored, and it became one of the Ten Commandments.

That being said, I saw a Facebook post from one whose father was absent. She went on and on of how her father in law was sweet and her husband was kind to their children, but what she missed was having memories of a real dad in which they were sharing special moments.

I made a comment of how sometimes we don't always get what we want, of how God made man AND women so that offspring would have two parents. Sometimes, however that is not always the case, as parents split apart or passions run wild and a woman is left to raise a child(ren) on her own. I said how all children are a gift from God, a loving father who may not always give us what we want, but can provide what we need.

Another person then commented to me about how my comment was completely inappropriate.

I grew up with two parents. The dysfunction of that household wore me down. Did I have a dad who did things with me? Ummmm....the sad thing is, I can't really think of much that he did that was memorable. He taught me how to ride a bike. He taught me how to change oil in a car and later, to drive it. But many memorable milestones in which he should have been there--he wasn't; Prom night. A wedding dance. Holding his first grandson. and more. I never felt like I had "enough," there were those empty spaces I felt I had to fill. Thus a bad first marriage and the broken relationships after that. Until I finally surrendered to God...I was empty, even WITH people in my life. Then along came Rob. In him, I found what I needed. God led me TO him, because God felt that now, the student was ready!

Other children are luckier. They may have a real dad, a mentor dad, an uncle, stepdad or granddad who fills in and does it remarkably well. That is the point the original post MISSED. She had those male role models, but longed for something MORE.

We all long for something more. We go chasing things and when we get to "there," we are still disappointed because "there" is not what we thought it would be.

How about if we settle for "enough?" Are you happy? Is being happy "enough?"

My husband, Rob had a stepdad while he was growing up, and his stepdad was a real neat guy. Rob missed all of that because his own attitudes regarding his mother's marriage to him blinded Rob to all of the possibilities there could have been... if he'd only given it a chance! Rob was more focused on trying to find reasons to not like this male role model in his life, instead of appreciating what was right in front of him. (He told me all of this, so it isn't speculation. His stepdad verified this later with me.) Thus, the misbehaviors on Rob's part, gaining him negative attention, took him further from this relationship instead of closer. It wasn't until he was an adult himself that he finally appreciated his new dad enough to say that he never missed not knowing his biological dad and had no desire to contact him. He had "enough," why go searching for anything else? When Rob's stepdad passed, Rob took it hard...one of the things he admitted was wasting so much time chasing what wasn't there, he missed what was.

Some people may feel differently and go searching for that elusive parent. Sometimes they are excited with their discovery, other times, disappointed. My point is...the emptiness you may feel over not getting what you feel you are entitled to creates a chasm that crosses many situations. Feeling that someone isn't enough blinds you to things you already have or even, things that may occur in the future. You spend so much time fuming over a closed door, that you don't think for a moment that maybe that door is closed for a reason. Or that maybe, God is working on the other side of that door, preparing something for you that will just blow your mind away! Stop pounding on that door! Ask God instead to please guide your path. We won't be satisfied 100% of the time and what we have to ACCEPT is that it is OK to not be satisfied! Do you always want to have what you want? Or is it better to let God fill in the empty spaces within your mind?

That is what I was trying to convey in my comment to that post.

Today's society wants everything and we want it now. Fast technology, computers and stereos on our phones, cameras, too and photos we can download and upload to social media in seconds. We can travel around the world in seconds thanks to Google and smartphones. Yet our feelings and emotions still travel in real time. It is good to stop, to pause, to meditate...when have you actually just sat outside WITHOUT a phone...and listened to the sounds around you? The sounds of silence, it has been said, is annoying to may people, they always have to have that radio, that video, that something.

Jesus always went to the mountains, to the desert, to the sea to pray. Maybe, instead of feeling so self-entitled, if we did more of that, we could hear God speaking to us, telling us..."you have enough...because you have Me!"

Have a blessed day!