have a holly, jolly Christmas...?


It's December...time for those office parties, family get togethers, friends' out on the town nights.  I have seen posts on Facebook about "the day after"...and it isn't pretty...especially for those who live with an alcoholic. This time of the year is filled with fears...the "what-ifs" that can plague anyone. I have heard from so many of you...here are excerpts from notes and e-mails that I have received...names withheld of course.....Please...think about what your family and friends go through if you drink...what must you look like to them as you stumble through the days ahead. Enough cannot be said about driving drunk either...or what the kids think about you as you are passed out on the couch or floor....There are no easy answers to this...none at all....

From my files:

Dear Rev Baum;
My dad used to be a raging alcoholic, and has lost everything that he has ever valued in his whole life on multiple occasions. Including me. I am now seventeen, and I still don't know him very well. But I do wish him well, and hope that he has started appreciating everything he has been giving. I love you dad.... From your daughter...

I wish every family member of an alcoholic could hear this message, and that the person who is ready to hear the message could hear it as well. The one needs to know there is hope, the other, that there is somewhere to find help. Our family was fortunate, and I pray for that for others, also.

I don't think alcoholics know how much that drink hurts a lot of people. I'm praying my boyfriend realize it before it is too late.

 My friend died 7 years ago to alcohol. He fought the devil for a long time. He was 28 yrs old! Sucks ass that alcohol takes over so many peoples lives. RIP K.G.C

  I have been there. A recovering Alcoholic that gave up everything and went to the pen because I wasn't able to put down the bottle. I had to fix and work on everything. There are nights I'd wake up in cold sweats and shaking and not knowing what the hell was going on.

 God bless those on this journey. Fought the Devil himself with IV heroin use.. Lost everything. Clean for over a year.. With a wonderful man & expecting a baby in December. It takes strength but trust me, it's possible!

 My dads an alcoholic. He has been his whole life. He's also bipolar. After my mom took us and left (because he would beat us) I thought he would straighten up. But he didn't. I wish he would stop. He's going to die from liver problems. I just saw him for the first time in a year. And nothing had changed. I cry every time I think about it. It really hits home. Please dad stop. For the love of a daughter.

 sober now for awhile,with god's help i will get my wife and kids back, drugs make you numb to the ones you love, you have to fight the devil and don't take his hand,take god's hand instead. I love you Rachael and our kids,we will continue to battle the devil,we will have victory and glory! I miss you guys and you will always be a part of me.

 My son was sober seven years...then he fell off the wagon - and he died ( he got into a car with a drunk driver)...a drunk driver killed him!


  1. so what do you say to them, the alcoholics? and to the ones who watch them drink? as you said, there are no easy answers to any of this!

  2. judging a person does not define who THEY are--it defines who YOU are!

  3. "I've been there, that's why I'm here," by Kenny Chesney. Listen to it!

  4. Read the book..."there but for the grace of God (plus a few good friends & family) go I." by Diane Ganzer Baum. It doesn't have all the answers but it opens your eyes to what alcoholics go through. You will cry, I guarantee it.

  5. thank you Rev for the reminder. We get so caught up in the party atmosphere, we have booze flowing at our parties then get all mad if someone gets wired. We have no one to blame perhaps but ourselves...??? As someone else said here, try to see it from both sides.

  6. I was going to comment "thanks for such a downer of a column," but then I thought it over and realized that people do need a wakeup call. So actually thanks for the reminder..I hope others share this with those they love!!


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